Notatumor’s Weblog

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28146086/

See?  My doctor told me to become healthier and lower my blood pressure, and this must be the way to do it.

So, ummm…..any hawt volunteers of the opposite sex out there?  ;)

Randomness!

Discovered that singing after a night of drinking doesn’t work as well as you think it would.  My throat was all cotton-bally!  Nooo vocal control, even though I had some better low notes.

Apple stores are the bomb!  I think I want to work there.  Or at least adopt a hottie apple chick. yumm!

We need teleportation.  I love doing things, but hate driving (must-control-death-mobile).  I think NC drivers are, ummm, special, I believe is the politically correct word.  Get the fuck out of my way!  Or at least give me my own lane.

I have cool friends and family, and this online ’stuff’ is letting me keep in contact with them.

I love all the attention that I got today by wearing a Duke shirt.  SUCK IT UNC!!!!  

Need advice:  A friend of mine wants me to help with a pet shelter thing by volunteering and potentially fostering some kitties.  so…..would you be freaked out by a guy that fostered kitties if you were interested in dating him?

Speed dating tonight!  This ought to be amusing.  Again, don’t use the line ‘I was going to stab you if you said your favorite movie was ‘Pretty Woman’.  I think they tune out after the word ’stab’.  STAB STAB STABBY MCSTABERTON.

Macs Rock!  Need cool software for it though (he says, as handbrake chugs through a dvd in the background)

My Dad has to be the worse communicator in the world.  And with him, I appear to come in 2nd place.  Gets irritating that I need to be the adult in the contact dept. with that man.  HEY!  REMEMBER ME?  YOUR FIRSTBORN?  USE THE E-MAIL, LUUUUKE.  YOU ARE MY FAAAAAAAAAATHER.  

Never guess a woman’s age.  You can’t win.  Can’t can’t can’t!

Oh, and for those of you checking me out for the first time:  Poppy rocks.

Nice.  My somewhat public blog (and the ensuing drama) that came about has a rejoinder in a status note:

‘is starting to thing gender stereotypes do not apply in the technical field’

Nice.  She basically said something to that effect when we were having the drama – that I was being too….womanish.  or something that implied that I was being the ‘woman’ in the relationship because I was bringing up things that I didn’t like rather than being stoic and not saying anything.

Yeah.  whatever.  At least I know how to be a friend to someone.  The drama is because you *say* one thing, do another, and then wonder why someone gets upset when you’re not doing what you say.

Honestly, in a meta sort of way, it comes to this.  You need to know the difference between a friend and an acquaintance.  I think too many people associate with each other and thing that they’re friends, when really, deep down, they’re not.  They’re just friendly acquaintances.

I talked to another friend about this – and then 5 minutes later he was there when she basically came over and tried to be all friendly and commenting on my facebook profile and making fun of my picture with glasses on fbook.

*that’s* what makes it hard.  She does, in a strange way, *act* like a friend.  It’s like she wants a friendship where she can joke, and make fun, and have fun at work, but without any of the obligations that true friendship entails.  Not that they’re really obligations – sharing each others lives is should be easy and natural *if you want to do it*

Hmmm, my first shoutout to an old post in another blog:

http://hisstory1.blogspot.com/2007/06/friends-vs-acquaintances.html

Which I think says what I want to say.  That and, I don’t need more acquaintances, thanks.  You’re either in the circle of trust, or out.  (thanks Meet the Fockers!).  No fringe blurry types circles, thanks.

kthxbye

LOL

http://www.crainsnewyork.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20081020/FREE/810209982/1105

Now if they could just work Duke in there, we can get all of the most hated sports franchises in America together and me SUPER-MEGA-MONDO powerful!!!!

“And I’ll form the head!!!!”

God.  I’m not sure how I became a Yankees fan and a Duke fan, but it’s tough sometimes.  Nobody likes us.  :)  Then again, my team choices are more so I have something to root against my friends with, not with.  :)

So screw you, Socks fans.  I’m glad you lost.  :P

I don’t do long term relationships!  Stop acting like I’ll change my mind and eventually move back!!!  It’s not going to happen!

And they decorate your cube, and make you a cake…generally embarassing you.  The one person you know is behind it (who is a friend, or at least a friendly person at work,that you used to hang out with) says he has a gift for you, and to let them know when you want to get it because they left it in their car.

do you 

a)  Thank them and say ‘thanks for the stuff today’ and go get the gift?

b)  ignore the fact that they got you a gift, and when they text you to remind you, do nothing?

I know what my choice would be.  That’s just me, however.  

I’m more frustrated with myself than anything.  That whole ‘fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me’ thing.  I feel like I let myself get fooled once, and then thought things would be different the 2nd time, and it’s not.  

If someone says they want to be your friend, and act like a good friend, and then they don’t, do you call them on it or just let them go?  What if it’s a case of your version of good friend and theirs is just different?  Would adding drama to this and calling them on it really help?  Or is it *your* fault for expecting something from somebody and having them consistently not give it, yet you keep expecting them to because they said they would 3 months ago?

Then again, I could just be pissy because I’m 90% certain she’s dating someone else in the office and is lying to everyone about it.  So far I’m 100% correct in those assumptions (I called the last one) so it wouldn’t surprise me to be right again.

So…yeah.  The new (old) rules are back in play.  Ignore the person involved – don’t be pissy or an ass about it, but don’t let her into your life if she’s not letting you into hers.

I guess I just hoped to be over this crap already.   My mind has figured this all out.  The heart is just being a biatch about it.

I mean, really, is it that hard to be somebody’s friend?  I don’t find it hard.  If she is finding it hard to be my friend, then that’s saying something right there.

I was just looking forward to have a ‘girl space friend’ to hang out and do things with, and I’m disappointed that it had the potential to do that (and she even said she wanted to be!) but it’s not meant to be.

Picking up a police report for the laptop that was stolen out of my car a few weeks back.  I had planned to be there for a while, this was the government, right?

Yes and No.  I get there, with my police report number, and expect the worst…but only 1 person is in line.  WOOT!

Or so I thought.

There’s this lady there, and she doesn’t have a report number.  Here’s a sample of questions/comments:

• “I think it was a motor cycle accident”
• “It was reported on the news, there has to be a police report”
• ” I think it was the intersection of X/Y street”
• ” It was either Friday or Saturday

WTF LADY!  I had my report number, and had to sit there and listen to you, because you were clueless and didn’t do *any* research about this stuff ahead of time, try to get some poor lady to pull up a report for you!!!   HOLY FARK!

It’s the *government*.  It’s the *police*!  Have your shit together *before* you show up.  You are exactly why people at the DMV and everywhere else hate their jobs.   DO SOME FUCKING WORK SO THE REST OF THEM AND US CAN GET ON WITH OUR DAMN LIVES WITHOUT WAITING ON YOUR SORRY ASS.

Luckily, some other lady at the department came over and took pity on me.  I handed her my case number, and had 2 copies of the report 3 minutes later.

But that’s still 20 minutes of my life I wasted.  THANKS FOR NOTHING.

I need a banner image, people!  Get to work!  I’ll post some things and ya’all (hahahaha, I’m going native) can help me decide, and contribute as well.  

Ah’ll be back!

I’ve been Meh.  Ever sleep but never feel rested?  Go to work but not really enjoy things that you typically do, and get behind?  Yeah.  It’s been one of those weeks (months?)
Anyhoo.  Another reason I haven’t been blogging is that I was concerned nobody was reading.  I’ve disabused myself of that notion by going through some archives and realize that most people start at 0.  :)  Probably have some lurkers too.

The other non-fun thing I’ve been contemplating is ‘crossover’ issues – what if I want to blog about something that’s bothering me/amusing (personal) and the people that I would most like to share/let know about this blog are involved?  Or people read and get information about other people that they wouldn’t otherwise know?  I know it seems pretty silly to not have considered this *before* blogging, and how to handle it, but I’d rather think about it now before I commit to blogging and turn it up to ‘11′.

Also, I don’t want this to become a ‘vent only’ forum.  My life isn’t all angst.  Who wants to read a blog that is ‘my latest trouble is XYZ?’

  Also some trivial matters:

1)  I don’t like my name (notatumor).  I don’t know why, I needed something, but this is blah.  My pseudonym I used from college on is associated with my name, so I can’t use it.  I need a good *name*

2)  I don’t like the way I started this blog.  I think I could potentially lose a friend (PYT) if this was ever found.  Plus it just hurts to know that I wrote something like that down and it’s on teh internets for all of eternity

So yeah, I’ve been hiatusy.  But I’m almost back.  I feel more human every day

On the fun side, I have a MAC.  So I’m at least back into hobby mode with my computer, instead of dreading working on the POS laptop that I’m logged into what seems every day of my life.  WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

To my true friends -

And you know who you are.  The ones who call me – the ones who write or talk or do things with me….

I’m understanding how much that means now that I’m going through the struggle of having to let someone (see the arrivaderci post) go as a friend again.  It sucks when you invest a lot in someone expecting and hoping that they’ll be your friend (or continue to be) and you don’t get the ‘return’ you expect – the return attention/emotion/whatever that indicates it’s a 2 way street.  The realization that you have to let them go because they’re not healthy, or they just don’t care, and they’re using you, even if they don’t mean to.

So….for those of you who are reading, and are my true friend (and those of you who may someday read this) -

Thanks.  You rock.